I have not posted since April, primarily because I haven't actually been baking as much. I have baked a few things over the past several months: some ginger cookies that were so gingery I could not eat them, some blueberry muffins (pictured below) that were good except that I had to use the all-purpose store bought white flour that I have now become a snob about not using, some brownies that were awesome and got eaten before there were pictures taken, and some burger rolls that I have made before.
The good news is that I have several big reasons for not baking...well, two big reasons. 1) William got a new job and so our chill summer quickly turned into a summer of moving craziness, and 2) I am preggo again (with a girl) and had knock-down, drag-out nausea and exhaustion from mid June to about mid August. Our summer ended up being a little bit more about surviving each day without killing each other, throwing up, or completely melting down because of stress and anxiety. (It really wasn't that bad, but I wouldn't characterize it as relaxing or fun.)
We have now been in Memphis almost two months which is crazy! We have mostly figured out our way around...to work, the grocery store, the park, some restaraunts, and even a church that we feel pretty good about. But the city still doesn't feel like home. I know that some of that is because we have actually been out of town a good bit (now that my family and friends are closer). However, I know that much of it is because we are now in the place where we have to do the hard work of actually getting involved, participating, and putting ourselves out there. Although I am very much an extroverted, people person, I am finding that it takes a lot of courage and energy to find and create community.
Which brings me to the idea of transitions... I talk about daily transitions in child care settings all of the time at work, but I don't know that I really take the time to reflect on other kinds of transitions. I am discovering that whatever the transition (new job, new city, new baby, new drive to be more purposeful and mindful), that it requires a lot of trust. Trust in myself, trust in my husband, trust that love is bigger than fear, trust that I am not alone in the good or the bad or the in-between in my life. I find myself wanting to trust in all of those things, and many times I do succeed in that, but trusting in general has never been my strong suit. I have always been a little skeptical...needing to figure out things on my own before I accept that something will work for me.
But here I am now, with all of these new transitions and what I am trying to take as new opportunities to learn trust and exhibit courage, to be brave and authentic and vulnearable and enthusiastic. To show this little girl growing inside me that this world is both scary and beautiful, and that each day is a new day to discover that world. So I pray that I can keep doing that each day, each moment.
And now I leave you with pictures of a growing belly and baby (and me learning to trust that my weight and body shape do not define me).
12 weeks!
18 weeks
The good news is that I have several big reasons for not baking...well, two big reasons. 1) William got a new job and so our chill summer quickly turned into a summer of moving craziness, and 2) I am preggo again (with a girl) and had knock-down, drag-out nausea and exhaustion from mid June to about mid August. Our summer ended up being a little bit more about surviving each day without killing each other, throwing up, or completely melting down because of stress and anxiety. (It really wasn't that bad, but I wouldn't characterize it as relaxing or fun.)
We have now been in Memphis almost two months which is crazy! We have mostly figured out our way around...to work, the grocery store, the park, some restaraunts, and even a church that we feel pretty good about. But the city still doesn't feel like home. I know that some of that is because we have actually been out of town a good bit (now that my family and friends are closer). However, I know that much of it is because we are now in the place where we have to do the hard work of actually getting involved, participating, and putting ourselves out there. Although I am very much an extroverted, people person, I am finding that it takes a lot of courage and energy to find and create community.
Which brings me to the idea of transitions... I talk about daily transitions in child care settings all of the time at work, but I don't know that I really take the time to reflect on other kinds of transitions. I am discovering that whatever the transition (new job, new city, new baby, new drive to be more purposeful and mindful), that it requires a lot of trust. Trust in myself, trust in my husband, trust that love is bigger than fear, trust that I am not alone in the good or the bad or the in-between in my life. I find myself wanting to trust in all of those things, and many times I do succeed in that, but trusting in general has never been my strong suit. I have always been a little skeptical...needing to figure out things on my own before I accept that something will work for me.
But here I am now, with all of these new transitions and what I am trying to take as new opportunities to learn trust and exhibit courage, to be brave and authentic and vulnearable and enthusiastic. To show this little girl growing inside me that this world is both scary and beautiful, and that each day is a new day to discover that world. So I pray that I can keep doing that each day, each moment.
And now I leave you with pictures of a growing belly and baby (and me learning to trust that my weight and body shape do not define me).
